| THE OLDER WE GET, THE RICHER WE ARE!! | |
 |
8 Grins |
0 Growls
Posted in Links / Text Jokes
2 days ago by TheSimpsons Tagged with: richer older Make a comment |
| AND WHO SAYS WE'RE NOT RICH!!! Silver in the Hair Gold in the Teeth. Stones in the Kidneys Sugar in the Blood. Lead in the Ass. Iron in the Arteries. And an inexhaustible supply of Natural Gas. I... Read more | |
| (45 words) | |
| Haai wysheid | |
|
10 Grins |
3 Growls
Posted in Links / Text Jokes
3 days ago by Nash Tagged with: wysheid nash haai afrikaans Make a comment |
| Twee groot wit haaie swem in die see en sien 'n skip wat sink. “Volg my, seun” sê pappa haai vir sy seun en hulle swem tot by die skip. “Eers swem... Read more | |
| (120 words) | |
| Fairy grants a wish | |
|
12 Grins |
0 Growls
Posted in Links / Text Jokes
3 days ago by TheSimpsons Tagged with: wish grants fairy Make a comment |
| I met a fairy today who granted me one wish. "I want to live forever," I said. "Sorry," said the fairy, "but I am not allowed to grant that type of wish." "Fine,"... Read more | |
| (53 words) | |
| Stress | |
|
6 Grins |
5 Growls
Posted in Links / Text Jokes
4 days ago by SS Tagged with: stress Make a comment |
| A lecturer, when explaining stress management to an audience, raised a glass of water and asked, "How heavy is this glass of water?" Answers called out ranged from 20g to... Read more | |
| (466 words) | |
| Rugby deesdae ... | |
|
11 Grins |
1 Growls
Posted in Links / Text Jokes
6 days ago by TheSimpsons Tagged with: rugby deesdae arikaans Make a comment |
| Om deesdae toetsrugby te kyk is dieselfde as om wildtuin toe te gaan: Jy eet lekker biltong, drink lekker bier en kyk hoe kak die bokke!... Read more | |
| (26 words) | |
| Sofa s3x | |
|
11 Grins |
0 Growls
PG13L Posted in Links / Text Jokes 6 days ago by BN Tagged with: sofa s3x pg13l Make a comment |
| A frustrated wife buys a pair of crotchless panties in an attempt to spice up her dead sex-life. She puts them on, together with a short skirt and sits... Read more | |
| (77 words) | |
| School friends | |
|
9 Grins |
0 Growls
PG13 Posted in Links / Text Jokes 7 days ago by TheSimpsons Tagged with: school pg13 friends Make a comment |
| Rachel, Clare and Samantha haven't seen each other since High School. They rediscover each other via a reunion website and arrange to meet for lunch in a wine bar. Rachel arrives... Read more | |
| (310 words) | |
| Johnny classic | |
|
8 Grins |
0 Growls
PG13L Posted in Links / Text Jokes 7 days ago by TheSimpsons Tagged with: pg13l johnny classic Make a comment |
| The teacher asks Johnny, "Johnny, can you tell me the name of 2 great kings who have brought happiness and peace into people's lives?" And Johnny says: “Drin-king and fuc-king!!”... Read more | |
| (29 words) | |
| Laugh a bit! | |
|
3 Grins |
8 Growls
Posted in Links / Text Jokes
1 week ago by QuickSand Tagged with: slogans quicksand marketing laugh corporates Make a comment |
| Research shows that guys no longer date girls from ABSA because they are always thinking of "...today, tomorrow and being together forever" OR girls from FNB because they are always... Read more | |
| (99 words) | |
| Never, ever question a drunk... | |
|
5 Grins |
3 Growls
Posted in Links / Text Jokes
1 week ago by TheSimpsons Tagged with: question local drunk Make a comment |
| I was shopping at the local supermarket where I selected the following: a litre of milk a carton of eggs a carton of orange juice a 250 gram package of bacon a head of lettuce a... Read more | |
| (171 words) | |
| Gou twee grappies, verskoon as dit bietjie stout is... | |
|
7 Grins |
4 Growls
PG13S Posted in Links / Text Jokes 1 week ago by Nash Tagged with: verskoon twee stout pg13s pg13l nash grappies gou bietjie afrikaans Make a comment |
| Maria maak Oubaas en Hilda se bed op en kom op 'n kondoom af.. Maria: "Ouma wat is die deng by die koi?" Hilda: "Ag Maria, dis sommer deel van my en... Read more | |
| (99 words) | |
| Quote of the Day - Defining Calories: | |
|
6 Grins |
1 Growls
Posted in Links / Text Jokes
2 weeks ago by TheSimpsons Tagged with: quote defining calories Make a comment |
| Defining Calories: Calories are the little buggers that get into your wardrobe at night and sew your clothes tighter!... Read more | |
| (19 words) | |
| Trying ... | |
|
11 Grins |
6 Growls
PG13L Posted in Links / Text Jokes 2 weeks ago by SS Tagged with: trying pg13l Make a comment |
| A woman comes home and finds her husband in bed with a female midget! Furious, she screams, you promised you wouldn't cheat again! The husband replies, for F*** sake, can't you see... Read more | |
| (37 words) | |
| Gatiep het als verloor ... | |
|
4 Grins |
4 Growls
Posted in Links / Text Jokes
2 weeks ago by DS Tagged with: verloor het gatiep als afrikaans Make a comment |
| Gatiep sit in sy garage waar hy die laaste goed moet ontruim en bepeins sy lot. Hy't sy huis verloor, sy werk verloor en sy vrou het die kinders gevat en... Read more | |
| (134 words) | |
| They walk among us (they surely do) | |
|
19 Grins |
0 Growls
Posted in Links / Text Jokes
2 weeks ago by TheSimpsons Tagged with: walk surely among Make a comment |
| IDIOT SIGHTING #1 My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a £5 note. Our total was £4.20, so I also handed her a... Read more | |
| (527 words) | |
| A Brave Cowboy | |
|
12 Grins |
0 Growls
PG13 Posted in Links / Text Jokes 2 weeks ago by TheSimpsons Tagged with: pg13 cowboy brave Make a comment |
| A cowboy appeared before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. 'Have you ever done anything of particular merit?' St. Peter asked 'Well, I can think of one thing,' the... Read more | |
| (129 words) | |
| Nee wat..... | |
|
13 Grins |
2 Growls
Posted in Links / Text Jokes
3 weeks ago by AP Tagged with: wat nee blonde afrikaans Make a comment |
| 'n Blinde ou stap per ongeluk by 'n lesbian bar in. Hy gaan sit op 'n barstoel en bestel 'n drankie . Terwyl hy daar sit, skreeu hy vir die bartender:... Read more | |
| (147 words) | |
| WOMEN'S REVENGE | |
|
12 Grins |
6 Growls
Posted in Links / Text Jokes
3 weeks ago by QuickSand Tagged with: women revenge quicksand Make a comment |
| DON'T CALL HOME FOR MONEY! A fifteen year-old boy came home with a Porsche and his parents began to yell and scream, "Where did you get that car?" He calmly told them, "I... Read more | |
| (266 words) | |
| Dyslectic Tourist | |
|
11 Grins |
2 Growls
PG13 Posted in Links / Text Jokes 3 weeks ago by Riaan Tagged with: tourist riaan pg13 dyslectic Make a comment |
| Did you hear about the dyslectic tourist? He wanted to blow a Zulufella!... Read more | |
| (13 words) | |
| God and ideal husbands | |
|
11 Grins |
0 Growls
Posted in Links / Text Jokes
3 weeks ago by NASH Tagged with: nash husbands god Make a comment |
| While creating Husbands, God promised Women that good and ideal Husbands would be found in all corners of the world. And then he made the earth round.... Read more | |
| (27 words) | |
| Linus Torvalds | |
|
5 Grins |
11 Growls
Posted in Links / Text Jokes
3 weeks ago by zero Tagged with: torvalds linux linus 2 comments |
| Linus Torvalds once found a segmentation fault in the universe. Linus Torvalds can run kill -9 and kill Chuck Norris. Linus Torvalds doesn't die, he simply returns zero. Linus Torvalds first written program... Read more | |
| (88 words) | |
| Lipstick in School - teach them well | |
|
18 Grins |
1 Growls
Posted in Links / Text Jokes
3 weeks ago by TheSimpsons Tagged with: well teach school lipstick Make a comment |
| Lipstick in School (You've got to love this principal) According to a news report, a certain private school in Brisbane was recently faced with a unique problem. A number of... Read more | |
| (207 words) | |
| Best world cup slogan | |
|
7 Grins |
1 Growls
PG13L Posted in Links / Text Jokes 3 weeks ago by QuickSand Tagged with: slogan quicksand pg13l Make a comment |
| The best slogan of the "World Cup": Vuvuzela is like wanking... ... the one doing it is the only one enjoying it!... Read more | |
| (21 words) | |
| Die .22 | |
|
14 Grins |
5 Growls
PG13 Posted in Links / Text Jokes 3 weeks ago by Danit Tagged with: pg13 danit afrikaans Make a comment |
| Koos sien 'n advertensie in die Landbouweekblad waar 'n boer tenders inwag vir iemand om die luiperds op sy plaas te vang en na 'n wildreservaat te verskuif. Hy besluit om te... Read more | |
| (231 words) | |
| Gynaecological Visit | |
|
1 Grins |
8 Growls
PG13 Posted in Links / Text Jokes 3 weeks ago by TheSimpsons Tagged with: pg13 gynaecological 1 comment |
| A middle-aged woman seemed sheepish as she visited her gynaecologist. "Come now," coaxed the doctor, "you've been seeing me for years. There's nothing you can't tell me." "This one's kind of strange,"... Read more | |
| (173 words) | |
